So, Marika tagged me. And for once, I will respond! (Trip to Europe: awesome. More later.)

FOODOLOGY

Q. What is your salad dressing of choice?
A. Balsamic vinaigrette. If I'm feeling creamy, ranch.

Q. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
A. I assume you mean a chain? Given NZ's limitations in this area, I'm going with Burger Fuel.

Q. What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
A. Cheap: that little Malaysian place in New Lynn. Less cheap: Bouchon Creperie in Kingsland.

Q. On average, what size tip do you leave at a restaurant?
A. None! Hahahahaha! For we pay our waitstaff a living wage! (Actually, I'll round up the bill sometimes, as a bonus. In the US, I usually went with 20%. It's easy to work out and you don't look like an asshole.)

Q. What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick off of?
A. There are quite a lot of these, I think. But I'll go with toast and Vegemite. Or toast and jam.

Q. What is your favorite type of gum?
A. I feel like gum is a have. It inspires your stomach to get all hungry, but you never get the payoff. And your jaw hurts. And the flavour disappears too damn fast. Given all that, Brent usually uses this stuff called 'Extra Professional' (don't ask me what's 'professional' about it), and that's what I have if I'm going to have gum.

TECHNOLOGY

Q. What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A. At work, it's a 1981 Robin Morrison photograph of the sadly defunct Paua Shell House in Bluff (an erstwhile wonder of the folk-art world). At home: a dumb picture of my dog.

Q. How many televisions are in your house?
A. Three. Only one has Sky. And one of the minor TVs is just to play video games on.

BIOLOGY

Q. What's your best feature?
A. Ack. Next!

Q. Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
A. Blood plasma. Teeth. Oh no, wait, none of the teeth were forcibly extracted.

Q. Which of your five senses do you think is keenest?
A. Any but sight. I am a four-eyes.

Q. When was the last time you had a cavity?
A. The last time I went to the dentist, two years ago. I am not the greatest cavity-withstander. I probably have nine fillings.

Q. What is the heaviest item you lifted last?
A. Either a box of donated books about Latin American history, or a suitcase from the Europe trip. That bag of Johnny Walker whisky for my mother was pretty heavy, too...

Q. Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
A. I fainted once. Those trilling birds circling your head aren't just in cartoons.

BULLSHITOLOGY

Q. If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
A. No! Wow, that would suck.

Q. Is love for real?
A. Duh.

Q. If you could change your first name, what would you change it to?
A. I wouldn't change my name. My name kicks ass.

Q. What color do you think looks best on you?
A. As a wee kid, my mother consistently dressed me in blue and/or brown. (Yes, it was the seventies.)

Q. Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake?
A. I have swallowed several bugs in my lifetime. Are they a non-food item?

Q. Have you ever saved someone's life?
A. No.

Q. Has someone ever saved yours?
A. Oh! Once when I was little I fell into the neighbour's pool. He got me out pretty fast, though.

DAREOLOGY

Q. Would you walk naked for a half mile down a public street for $100,000?
A. US dollars? Just call me Lady Godiva.

Q. Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100?
A. I've done it for free. Sure.

Q. Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000?
A. My *little* finger? US dollars? Maybe, depending on painkiller availability and reconstructive surgery options. I mean, that would totally crush my mortgage into submission, and I could then become a lady of leisure (see below).

Q. Would you never blog again for $50,000?
A. There's always Livejournal, isn't there?

Q. Would you pose nude in a magazine for $250,000?
A. No. That's way too big an audience.

Q. Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1,000?
A. Probably not. I may be cheap, but I'm not that cheap.

Q. Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000?
A. Oh dear. No, I probably couldn't go through with that. Even if it was Hitler.

Q. Would you give up watching television for a year for $25,000?
A. Not an option. Do you *know* me?

Q. Give up MySpace forever for $30,000?
A. I hate MySpace. I just find it confusing. I am old. Yes, in other words.

DUMBOLOGY

Q: What is in your left pocket?
A. Nada.

Q: Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a good movie?
A. No! I'm so glad you asked that. It's funny in parts, but you never invest in the characters enough, and the 'laughing at quirky nerds in suburbia' trope is getting old. The opening credits are the best part. Rushmore mines the same territory but is about one hundred billion times better.

Q: Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house?
A. Oooh, both. Walls are Scandinavian-wash wood, floor is carpet. Did I just blow your mind?

Q: Do you sit or stand in the shower?
A. Stand. Is there a seat in your shower or something?

Q: Could you live with roommates?
A. Nay. I have a very high need for home to equal personal sanctuary.

Q: How many pairs of flip-flops do you own?
A. Two. I only wear one, though.

Q: Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
A. Define 'run-in'. I reported a stolen bag...

Q: What do you want to be when you grow up?

A lady of leisure.

LASTOLOGY

Q: Friend you talked to?
A. On the computer? Lawrence. Or Rachael. In person? Danni and Gary, weirdly enough.

Q: Last person you called?
A. My mother.

RANDOMOLOGY

Q: First place you went this morning?
A. Work.

Q: What can you not wait to do?
A. Get paid so I don't have to keep eating ramen noodles.

Q: What's the last movie you saw?
A. Something on the plane. Notes on a Scandal. Or Borat.

Q: Are you a friendly person?
A. Yes! Although I might be less eager-puppy friendly than I used to be, in general. Is this maturity or just fatigue?